This morning I was reading my devotions from the book of Isaiah chapter 37. Sennacherib, king of Assyria was threatening to attack Jerusalem. He was a fearsome adversary too, because in addition to making threats he attacked the very foundations of Jerusalem's hope and assurance - their faith in their king and in their God. Its propaganda 101.
Sennacherib sends messengers to Jerusalem not to speak to just King Hezekiah but to shout out messages to the people of Jerusalem. In chapter 36 the messengers shout, "Do not let Hezekiah deceive you. He cannot deliver you! Do not let Hezekiah persuade you to trust in the Lord when he says, "The Lord will surely deliver us; this city will not be given into the hand of the king of Assyria... Do not listen to Hezekiah. This is what the king of Assyria says: Make peace with me and come out to me. Then each of you will eat fruit from your own vine and fig tree and drink water from your own cistern, until I come and take you to a land like your own -a land of grain and new wine, a land of bread and vineyards...Do not let Hezekiah mislead you when he says, "The Lord will deliver us."
Upon hearing these things Hezekiah is very distressed. He knows that unless the Lord steps in they are done for - finished. He tears his robes and puts on sack cloth (a symbol of mourning) BUT he goes to the temple and he sends word to Isaiah the prophet. "It may be that the Lord your God will hear the words of the field commander, whom his master, the king of Assyria, has sent to ridicule the living God, and that he will rebuke him for the words the Lord your God has heard. THEREFORE PRAY FOR THE REMNANT THAT STILL SURVIVES."
Hezekiah had faith in God - just because you have faith doesn't mean you never get totally rocked by what is going on around you. Hezekiah recognized that Jerusalem may fall to Sennacherib (thus the tearing of the robes and sackcloth) BUT he went to the temple and asked the priest to pray for the remnant - those who had survived the onslaught of other nations, those who had survived exile.
It is difficult to have faith when everything seems to be calling your faith into question. Whispers of "Where was God when you lost your love one?" "Look at what you've already been through. Why would He step in now?" Sneers of "I saw you fail. You're a failure. You can't please God. Why would He help you now? Why would He even care?" Or even a simple "You suck."
The verse struck me like a little shaft of light forcing its way through the cracks. Pray for the remnant. I need to pray for the remnant in my friends' hearts - and even in my own heart. We need to pray for little part of our faith - sometimes minuscule - that has managed to survive. Pray that is will be strengthen, that it will grow, that it will break through the darkness and hard rock that surrounds it.
We struggle with our own propaganda. The "voices" or questions that sneak into our heads and hearts are most dangerous when they call into question God's care for us rather than His existence. Tell a Christian - "strong" or not that God doesn't exist and they will either see them as "fightin' words" or simply walk away because in their hearts they believe - they know He exists. BUT tell someone God's is too big to be trifled by our tiny lives or that we have fallen too far to be recovered or that we are undeserving of being rescued - that is a weapon we all struggle to defend. Our insecurity is our greatest weakness. The greatest lies are not blatant contradictions to the truth but distractions from the truth or a mere twisting of the truth.
I went through a very dark time a s young adult. I cut off all communication with God. Still attended church - was even a leader in our youth ministry and registered to attend Bible college. But I was losing the war that raged within my heart and mind. My life was a mess unbeknownest to everyone on the outside. Sin and insecurity had crept in and I had allowed it to. The shame was unbearable and at times overwhelming. My heart became very hard and very jaded and I was angry all the time. During that time I did a strange but very 'concrete' thing. I slept with my Bible under my pillow. I didn't read it, just slept with it. In some strange but redemptive way it was the only thing I felt I could trust.
(This portion for some reason did not publish when I first posted???)
In my first week of Bible college the program I was a part of went on a spiritual retreat. In the first meeting we had I went up to the front of the room and by myself knelt down and prayed, "God, change my life or end it - I can't do this anymore." And I let go. I let go of everything. I had too. Holding on to everything too tightly and too desperately had made me weak and my 19 year old self, old. I let go of all the self talk that heaped on my shame and piled on the guilt, that minimized God's grace and His power to redeem me and erased my remembrance of His desire for me. I let go of the sin that seemed to drag me back time and time again. I was free.
I realise now that I have to do that daily with everything. With those I love and I am afraid to lose. With those I struggle to love - including myself. I have to go to God in sackcloth, recognizing it is ALL beyond my control and give it to Him. Praying that He has heard all the voices and lies that called into to question His love and His grace and His faithfulness that I have allowed to speak into my mind and heart and that He will go to battle for me. That He will come to my rescue. That He will rescue the remnant in me. He will set me free again.
And I recognize I need to pray the same for my friends and family who are struggling. That God will come burst through the propaganda that they have been fed, that He will tear down the banners of shame and despair and He will shut the mouths of the liars and open their eyes and their hearts to His love and His victory!
Some battles will be lost, but not one person needs to be. Pray for the survivors - even if they are barely surviving.
